This was an insane weekend:
Thursday
Yes it started on Thursday because that is the day I was moving furniture. Corky's Dad went into ICU with various health issues with his lungs. As an elderly person, these things happen, but they are still difficult to handle when it is your own parent. In anticipation for a new bed delivery on Friday, I had to move my bed to The Oldest's room. We moved his futon to the garage on Tuesday afternoon and he "cleaned" his room and slept on the floor. I finished actually cleaning his room, took apart my bed and moved it to his room. I also moved a couple of heavy pieces of furniture in his room to make the bed fit. I put everything back together in his room to be able to sleep.
Friday
Got up early and began cleaning my room and vacuuming and moving furniture. I had to empty the two pieces of furniture to move them, and then put them back together. Dropped The Youngest and a friend at school, picked up programs for Saturday's Crab Feed, and tried to also pick up extra raffle tickets for the same event, but every place that sells raffle tickets wasn't yet open. Waited at home for the new bed delivery, and they arrived about 10 minutes after the window for delivery started. They were finished in about 30 minutes, and I had only had about an hour before work meetings, not enough time to buy bedding and raffle tickets. Had a couple of meetings for work lasting about 3 hours, and tried to go out for bedding again, only to be derailed by needing to meet one of the treasurers at the bank to get the final checks and cash for the crab feed. By the time that was finished, the crab feed chair person wanted to meet to transfer the cash and checks in about 45 minutes. Still not enough time to get bedding, and there was no way I was leaving that kind of cash in my car while I shopped. So I went back home and worked for a while. Went to the school to meet the chair person, who was running late. By the time that was over, I had about 30 minutes before school got out. Ran and quickly got the raffle tickets, came back and picked up The Oldest and took him to gather the bedding. Luckily, I was able to find satisfactory bedding at the first stop, and was in and out in 20 minutes. The Oldest wanted to get his iPad from his father's, so off to that town, had to gas up my car, and got back to pick up The Youngest about 10 minutes after he got out. As I was pulling up, got a text from bf saying she was in The Oldest's science classroom, and the teacher told her that The Oldest was doing badly in class. WHY the teacher thought that appropriate to share with anyone OTHER than me or the ex, I have no idea. So, I sent in The Oldest to talk to her. Turns out his lab plan was crap - which I already knew and had fought him about on Monday. Didn't get home until 5:00, only to find out that bf and her son were on their way to my house so her son and The Oldest could finish their science project. No thought on ANYONE's part about when it would be more convenient for me, no. My desires and needs once again thrown by the wayside and they were here until 7:15. There were hints that they wanted to have dinner here, but I did not bite because I was pissed off. I really did not want them at the house at that time, and the longer it went on, the angrier I was getting. I did manage to feed The Boys and sit with them for dinner, put the bedding in the wash and get it turned around and on the bed before Corky got back from the hospital at 8:00. I was physically and mentally exhausted, and after getting The Boys to bed and talking to Corky about her pop, I just wanted to sleep in my new bed.
Saturday
Corky let me sleep in until about 8:30, by which time The Boys were up. Corky wanted them to do homework before any other activity, so I was up and writing homework on their white boards, and arguing about missing assignments and homework and grades. All I wanted was some alone time with Corky, a quiet and relaxing morning, and instead I got arguments with The Boys and more stress about schoolwork and tutors and grades. Looking at my level of stress and the feeling like I just can't catch a break on anything. I get resistance to homework from both The Boys and the ex, I have tutors working with The Boys, and there is little to no improvement, and every time I try to have intimate time with Corky, there is some obstacle to that. Left the house to work the crab feed for the next 10 hours. I helped set up, greet people, serve food and check out auction winners. It was a LONG day, but the crab feed itself was a HUGE success and fun. All of the volunteers who were there were super flexible and dedicated to making the event run smoothly. The chairperson for the event did a fantastic job. The High School PFSO tried recruiting me, but I held fast that I still have 2 years after this one on the middle school PFC. While I was gone, Corky hung out with The Boys, the ex picked up The Youngest for an indoor soccer game, and didn't return him until 11:30pm. Got home after midnight, went to bed, but was too wound up to sleep, and tossed and turned all night. Also was really emotional and weepy for a while before falling asleep.
Sunday
Was up by 7, and logged into work by 8 because it is a major software release weekend, and I am supposed to help the person monitoring the release. Only I was not told until Friday that expectation, and there was no way I could be on the chat room by 4:30am my time... Spent all day and night monitoring the chat room and just seeing what was going on. The Youngest slept in and then went to a friend's to run Lacrosse drills. The Oldest fought with me over homework and practiced music. Corky went to visit her dad. I was still fairly weepy from lack of rest. Corky made all of my meals and I am grateful for her and her ability to know exactly what I need and when. The Boys watched Grease after dinner and showers and I watched the chat room some more while dealing with an eye twitch I'd had all day. I'm tired, and my throat is scratchy. Tonight I look forward to sleeping a full night, which is possible for the release finished at 8:45. Looks like she wants me to send some communications and track some issues to resolution tomorrow, but I have no clue who to send what info to, and I am not on distribution for most of the things she is getting and then sending to leadership. Monday will be another long day. Of course as a salaried person, I do not get overtime for working 12+ hours today, though my boss may give me some comp time. We'll see.
Showing posts with label boys. Show all posts
Showing posts with label boys. Show all posts
Monday, February 23, 2015
Wednesday, February 18, 2015
Daily drivel
Today I had more good news about The Oldest. In addition to the outstanding musician medal on Saturday, he won a scholarship to a two week band camp over the summer. I am so proud of him and how much effort he's been putting into school and music. I checked his grades and he has all As and Bs. Of course, that good news is tempered by having checked The Youngest's grades. Found out that The Youngest is getting two Ds and an F, mostly due to a HUGE assignment that he has not turned in, despite swearing he would finish it at his Father's and turn it in. Neither happened, and I am not all that surprised, but still I sigh the sigh of disappointment and resignation. I had him finish it tonight, and checked the additional homework before they had showers, during which the computer system used to determine missing and late work went down. It came back up after they were in bed... Of course. I had coffee with a friend who is doing particularly well, and I am happy for her. Also met with the principal of the middle school and outlined my issues with various teachers, as well as the current thoughts of other parents.
Today I also came to the realization that I need to buy all new bedding before Friday, and I'm not sure when I'll have the chance to do so...
Today I also came to the realization that I need to buy all new bedding before Friday, and I'm not sure when I'll have the chance to do so...
Tuesday, February 17, 2015
Blog as journal
Today felt rather productive, which is a change from how things have been lately. The Boys had Presidents Day off and mostly lazed about the house while I worked. I did get The Oldest to mow the front lawn while the youngest took his lacrosse stick out for a spin.
I finished the crab feed program and sent it to the printer, proofed the one off, and asked for just a tiny change. It looks fabulous and I am glad that is behind me!
Took The Boys for haircuts. The Oldest because his last cut was a disaster and needed to be fixed, and The Youngest because he'd become a hair farmer, his last cut having been in June of last year - a buzz cut for swim season. They look much better now, and I lament the fact that The Youngest now looks like a teenager (even though he isn't yet 12).
While The Boys were in the barber shop, Corky and I went back to the mattress shop to buy our new bed. It is a big step, buying an expensive piece of furniture together, and for me it means I am investing in a future that she will be a part of. I am looking forward to having a nice and comfortable place to sleep.
I also did Corky's taxes for her on line, and sent them off. I will be meeting with my CPA later this month as well, but while Corky gets a nice little refund, I expect to pay in the thousands. Bah.
The rest of this week will be meetings, and preparations for the crab feed, and the arrival of the new bed.
This evening ended up being rather mellow with The Boys finishing homework and my having a bit of free time to write. Nice.
I finished the crab feed program and sent it to the printer, proofed the one off, and asked for just a tiny change. It looks fabulous and I am glad that is behind me!
Took The Boys for haircuts. The Oldest because his last cut was a disaster and needed to be fixed, and The Youngest because he'd become a hair farmer, his last cut having been in June of last year - a buzz cut for swim season. They look much better now, and I lament the fact that The Youngest now looks like a teenager (even though he isn't yet 12).
While The Boys were in the barber shop, Corky and I went back to the mattress shop to buy our new bed. It is a big step, buying an expensive piece of furniture together, and for me it means I am investing in a future that she will be a part of. I am looking forward to having a nice and comfortable place to sleep.
I also did Corky's taxes for her on line, and sent them off. I will be meeting with my CPA later this month as well, but while Corky gets a nice little refund, I expect to pay in the thousands. Bah.
The rest of this week will be meetings, and preparations for the crab feed, and the arrival of the new bed.
This evening ended up being rather mellow with The Boys finishing homework and my having a bit of free time to write. Nice.
Monday, February 9, 2015
Monday Morning Weekend Wrap Up
No rest for the weary. No break from stress either.
Friday
Picked up kids from school, got home and had them doing homework rather quickly (this was not without the usual fights over "why?!" and "This is dumb!" and "I already did that". The last, when followed up with my desire to check said completed work is always met by, "God, you are so mean! why do you have to check everything!" and finding out that it was not yet even started. The exhausting arguing lasted all evening. The arguing also included Corky stepping in to tell The Boys when to pick their stuff up, and getting me involved for each and every infraction. I have a fundraiser coming up (that I am not the chair for, but as PFC President, there is still responsibility on my shoulders) and we are sorely needing volunteers. I am hitting up every possible angle for this, and still people are sitting on their hands. Last week the stress was ticket sales, this week it's volunteers. I'm sure next week will be something else entirely.
Saturday
The day started with arguments over homework and housework. One of The Youngest's friends came over to hang out in the afternoon (after The Youngest finished all chores and homework, even if the homework was so hastily and sloppily done that I had him send it to his teacher to proof read on Monday). Also along was my VP who was able to effectively talk me off of a cliff, AND take on additional responsibilities so that I don't have to do quite as much as I have been all year. At lease I am reassured that it is obvious to all others involved that I am doing the lion's share of the work, without the help of my co-president. Once they left it was the mad rush to finish prepping for my parents' visit and dinner. Sweeping, mopping, putting a meatloaf together and in the oven, peeling and boiling potatoes and washing and chopping Swiss chard. Dinner was nice, my mom did not criticize a single thing. My dad laughed and complimented the food (as did mom). The Oldest made the meatloaf, and Corky and I the sides. I also made icebox cake for dessert, which I hardly ever make because one of the ingredients are not readily available year round. My mom was surprised about my draconian screen time and bedtime rules, but she also has no idea what kind of trouble The Boys have gotten themselves into on screens, so I didn't get into it. We finished the evening with showers and bed because I was wiped out.
Sunday
Woke up EARLY with an upset stomach and horrible diarrhea - bleh. Woke up again a bit early, but not bad. Corky wanted to play, but I can't really have the level of intimacy I want because she is still sick, and I really absolutely must remain healthy. So I made sure she enjoyed herself, but I feel myself pulling away. I enjoy bringing her pleasure, but it isn't the same and I don't know if it is because we have not been able to be intimate in the way I enjoy, or if the constant demands of tidiness around the house puts unrealistic demands on me as a lackadaisical housekeeper, and sticks me in the middle of the arguments with the boys about their lack of tidiness. But I am just tired of everything. I am trying to de-stress on my own, but there is always some other demand on my time, attention, emotion or all of the above that leaves me feeling empty, without an oasis in sight, and no hope for reprieve.
I am irritable, and premenstrual - also does not help in any way because my luck will be to start my period in time for Corky to be perfectly healthy again, and Valentine's Day, which is our weekend away at Mardi Gras.
This afternoon we were going to take The Boys to the Pinball Museum, but they were closed for a private event. We ended up at an arcade (which was okay, but so crowded, that there was more waiting for an open game than actual play time). We took a break to look at the newsstand where The Boys begged me to buy them $40 worth of books, comics, magazines, junk food each. I offered to buy one comic book or item of food each. The youngest then proceeded to buy himself additional food and comic books... We stopped at one of my favorite shops on the way to the car and they again begged me to buy them stuff every time I turned around. They shadowed me through the store continuing their pleas, while the entire time was me saying"no" repeatedly, until I threatened to make them wait outside. Left for the car and there was more whining about what they didn't get to do or buy and how put upon they were to have to hold a magazine so that I could browse and purchase a pad of paper.
In the car finally and no one wants to go to eat the same food for dinner. The Boys are being intentionally contrary toward each other, so I drove back to my town and by then it was dinner time and they had agreed. When we got to said place, it was PACKED and there was no hope of having anything to eat within the hour. A second destination was picked and there was additional whining because it wasn't the suggestion of The Youngest. I stopped the car until a decision could be made, and by that Point I was hungry and had had it up to my eyeballs.
Got to second destination and the wait was not unreasonable. Ordered food and drinks. Food arrives and mine is cold. not lukewarm, but cold. It had been sitting on the pass through for a nice long time while our waitress sat at a booth visiting with a friend. All I wanted was a hot meal... Sent it back and the manager brought it the second time, another server brought our next round of drinks and the manager who brought the second round meal (which was actually hot) said she'd check back (never happened). The original waitress was asked for drinks (those had to come from another server we flagged down after 20 minutes of the original waitress visiting more with her friend in the booth).
By the time we left I just wanted to cry. I actually still do - typing this out isn't making me feel better, just sad and lonely and alone and like I'm not actually able to be in a relationship. I am difficult to live with when I am under extreme stress (Like now). I feel myself pulling away and not telling Corky when I am upset with her. Sometimes I don't even realize what the actual problem is, I do know that I don't always say when something bugs me.
Earlier this week I started reading a book for an LGBT book club a friend just started. Corky attended the first meeting with me and did not enjoy it. I didn't particularly enjoy it either because it was literally 4 people who already know each other discussing everything but the book we just were picking up. This isn't Corky's thing, and I get it, but I still want to read the book. It is fascinating so far, and I am enjoying it. Corky saw the book on the coffee table and when she realized which book it was and why I had it, she dismissed it as "Oh, that's the book for the stupid book club." and then went on to pooh pooh the club and the leader. I was pissed, but didn't say anything (which I should have because it has colored my entire week). I didn't want her to think she was in the wrong. Her opinion is valid, but her dismissing what I like was hurtful.
Then in bed on Saturday night, she made a remark about my stomach. I am already self conscious about being overweight, but had let my guard down with her because I thought (and still think) she loves my body. But comments like that make me wonder if she'll stick around, and I know how psychologically self destructive those comments are for me. I tend to internalize them and lash out by becoming even heavier (which is really a bad idea). From the age of 10 I have been sensitive about my weight, and the comments that have cut the deepest have come from those I love and respect the most. To have an ex who slept around on me really fucked with my head and heart, and I can feel the walls building up in my relationship and I don't know how to stop them...
Once we got home tonight, Corky needed copies of the medical records for disability, and of course my fucking printer runs out of fucking ink... I did manage to download her x-rays, so she can take the CD with her, and then I tried to fix The Oldest's glasses, took Corky's advice on it, and ended up fucking them seriously up. Finally (after hours) said "fuck it" and paper clipped them together, reinforced by duct tape. A trip to the Optometrist tomorrow after The Boys get out of school. Can't wait to see what this costs me.
This sucks. Tomorrow is Monday and I will be working - on what I have no idea.
Friday
Picked up kids from school, got home and had them doing homework rather quickly (this was not without the usual fights over "why?!" and "This is dumb!" and "I already did that". The last, when followed up with my desire to check said completed work is always met by, "God, you are so mean! why do you have to check everything!" and finding out that it was not yet even started. The exhausting arguing lasted all evening. The arguing also included Corky stepping in to tell The Boys when to pick their stuff up, and getting me involved for each and every infraction. I have a fundraiser coming up (that I am not the chair for, but as PFC President, there is still responsibility on my shoulders) and we are sorely needing volunteers. I am hitting up every possible angle for this, and still people are sitting on their hands. Last week the stress was ticket sales, this week it's volunteers. I'm sure next week will be something else entirely.
Saturday
The day started with arguments over homework and housework. One of The Youngest's friends came over to hang out in the afternoon (after The Youngest finished all chores and homework, even if the homework was so hastily and sloppily done that I had him send it to his teacher to proof read on Monday). Also along was my VP who was able to effectively talk me off of a cliff, AND take on additional responsibilities so that I don't have to do quite as much as I have been all year. At lease I am reassured that it is obvious to all others involved that I am doing the lion's share of the work, without the help of my co-president. Once they left it was the mad rush to finish prepping for my parents' visit and dinner. Sweeping, mopping, putting a meatloaf together and in the oven, peeling and boiling potatoes and washing and chopping Swiss chard. Dinner was nice, my mom did not criticize a single thing. My dad laughed and complimented the food (as did mom). The Oldest made the meatloaf, and Corky and I the sides. I also made icebox cake for dessert, which I hardly ever make because one of the ingredients are not readily available year round. My mom was surprised about my draconian screen time and bedtime rules, but she also has no idea what kind of trouble The Boys have gotten themselves into on screens, so I didn't get into it. We finished the evening with showers and bed because I was wiped out.
Sunday
Woke up EARLY with an upset stomach and horrible diarrhea - bleh. Woke up again a bit early, but not bad. Corky wanted to play, but I can't really have the level of intimacy I want because she is still sick, and I really absolutely must remain healthy. So I made sure she enjoyed herself, but I feel myself pulling away. I enjoy bringing her pleasure, but it isn't the same and I don't know if it is because we have not been able to be intimate in the way I enjoy, or if the constant demands of tidiness around the house puts unrealistic demands on me as a lackadaisical housekeeper, and sticks me in the middle of the arguments with the boys about their lack of tidiness. But I am just tired of everything. I am trying to de-stress on my own, but there is always some other demand on my time, attention, emotion or all of the above that leaves me feeling empty, without an oasis in sight, and no hope for reprieve.
I am irritable, and premenstrual - also does not help in any way because my luck will be to start my period in time for Corky to be perfectly healthy again, and Valentine's Day, which is our weekend away at Mardi Gras.
This afternoon we were going to take The Boys to the Pinball Museum, but they were closed for a private event. We ended up at an arcade (which was okay, but so crowded, that there was more waiting for an open game than actual play time). We took a break to look at the newsstand where The Boys begged me to buy them $40 worth of books, comics, magazines, junk food each. I offered to buy one comic book or item of food each. The youngest then proceeded to buy himself additional food and comic books... We stopped at one of my favorite shops on the way to the car and they again begged me to buy them stuff every time I turned around. They shadowed me through the store continuing their pleas, while the entire time was me saying"no" repeatedly, until I threatened to make them wait outside. Left for the car and there was more whining about what they didn't get to do or buy and how put upon they were to have to hold a magazine so that I could browse and purchase a pad of paper.
In the car finally and no one wants to go to eat the same food for dinner. The Boys are being intentionally contrary toward each other, so I drove back to my town and by then it was dinner time and they had agreed. When we got to said place, it was PACKED and there was no hope of having anything to eat within the hour. A second destination was picked and there was additional whining because it wasn't the suggestion of The Youngest. I stopped the car until a decision could be made, and by that Point I was hungry and had had it up to my eyeballs.
Got to second destination and the wait was not unreasonable. Ordered food and drinks. Food arrives and mine is cold. not lukewarm, but cold. It had been sitting on the pass through for a nice long time while our waitress sat at a booth visiting with a friend. All I wanted was a hot meal... Sent it back and the manager brought it the second time, another server brought our next round of drinks and the manager who brought the second round meal (which was actually hot) said she'd check back (never happened). The original waitress was asked for drinks (those had to come from another server we flagged down after 20 minutes of the original waitress visiting more with her friend in the booth).
By the time we left I just wanted to cry. I actually still do - typing this out isn't making me feel better, just sad and lonely and alone and like I'm not actually able to be in a relationship. I am difficult to live with when I am under extreme stress (Like now). I feel myself pulling away and not telling Corky when I am upset with her. Sometimes I don't even realize what the actual problem is, I do know that I don't always say when something bugs me.
Earlier this week I started reading a book for an LGBT book club a friend just started. Corky attended the first meeting with me and did not enjoy it. I didn't particularly enjoy it either because it was literally 4 people who already know each other discussing everything but the book we just were picking up. This isn't Corky's thing, and I get it, but I still want to read the book. It is fascinating so far, and I am enjoying it. Corky saw the book on the coffee table and when she realized which book it was and why I had it, she dismissed it as "Oh, that's the book for the stupid book club." and then went on to pooh pooh the club and the leader. I was pissed, but didn't say anything (which I should have because it has colored my entire week). I didn't want her to think she was in the wrong. Her opinion is valid, but her dismissing what I like was hurtful.
Then in bed on Saturday night, she made a remark about my stomach. I am already self conscious about being overweight, but had let my guard down with her because I thought (and still think) she loves my body. But comments like that make me wonder if she'll stick around, and I know how psychologically self destructive those comments are for me. I tend to internalize them and lash out by becoming even heavier (which is really a bad idea). From the age of 10 I have been sensitive about my weight, and the comments that have cut the deepest have come from those I love and respect the most. To have an ex who slept around on me really fucked with my head and heart, and I can feel the walls building up in my relationship and I don't know how to stop them...
Once we got home tonight, Corky needed copies of the medical records for disability, and of course my fucking printer runs out of fucking ink... I did manage to download her x-rays, so she can take the CD with her, and then I tried to fix The Oldest's glasses, took Corky's advice on it, and ended up fucking them seriously up. Finally (after hours) said "fuck it" and paper clipped them together, reinforced by duct tape. A trip to the Optometrist tomorrow after The Boys get out of school. Can't wait to see what this costs me.
This sucks. Tomorrow is Monday and I will be working - on what I have no idea.
Friday, February 6, 2015
Taking refuge in the written word
This has been a hell of a day, in a hell of a week. This week has seen several people who swore they'd help me back out. This week has had my ability to continue to do my job sliced off without so much as a "good luck asshole". During a meeting last night, I agreed to send an e-mail bulletin to the middle school parents begging for volunteers, which I was too tired to do at the time.
Today was what really took the cake though. I was called yesterday by the middle school nurse and asked to work scoliosis screening. I said sure, then asked my boss if I could take the day as my community service day. Since I can literally no longer do my job effectively, she agreed. I forgot I had therapy at 2:00. The screening went until 3:00, and in hindsight, I could have just gone, as there were just a few students left to screen at 1:45. I rescheduled therapy to 5:00, and made a dinner date with Corky. Corky and I have spent hardly any time together this week. She's still sick, and dog and house sat again. I had meetings, The Boys had homework. I was looking forward to a quiet dinner for the two of us. At 2:00 I received a text from the ex asking if I could pick The Boys up from school. I agreed (since I was already there and all). He then said he would let me know later when he would pick them up as his gf is out of town & he was going to be stuck on a job for a while. I let him know I had a 5:00 appointment & he replied that he didn't think he'd be by before then. Brought The Boys home and had them doing homework while Corky hung out and they whined that they would rather do it at their father's. I checked their work, made some corrective suggestions & got in another argument about what the assignment actually was. I sent another text to the ex reminding him that The Oldest was playing with the jazz band during the talent show, and he has the needed shirt. I said I could take The Boys to the gig, but I needed the shirt by 7:00. I left for therapy, where my therapist told me I need to find time to walk, or meditate - basically take better care of myself - and say no more often. On my way back, at 6:00, I sent another text to the ex asking if he was going to be able to make it to my house with the shirt by 7:00 (where he lives is 30 minutes in each direction). He said no, but would try to make the performance. Back home, pile The Boys into the car in a rush, say good-bye to Corky after she said she thought the talent show last year was horrible (and she was angry that our plans were upended). I shook my head and told her not to say that in front of the kids (mostly because that is exactly the reaction the ex has about these things). I bought The Boys fast food for dinner as they hadn't eaten while I was gone (I hate fast food), drove to the ex's and back and stayed at the talent show until it ended at 9:00. I still hadn't sent the e-mail, and I am so grateful that my VP did it for me. By the time I got The Boys showered and in bed it was after 10:00. I am so wiped out and just need to sleep - hopefully not to awaken at 1:15 like last night and stay up for 90 minutes. Sending thoughts to the universe that the morning will sail smoothly.
Not sure if I feel better now having written it all down, but at least it isn't still in my head...
Today was what really took the cake though. I was called yesterday by the middle school nurse and asked to work scoliosis screening. I said sure, then asked my boss if I could take the day as my community service day. Since I can literally no longer do my job effectively, she agreed. I forgot I had therapy at 2:00. The screening went until 3:00, and in hindsight, I could have just gone, as there were just a few students left to screen at 1:45. I rescheduled therapy to 5:00, and made a dinner date with Corky. Corky and I have spent hardly any time together this week. She's still sick, and dog and house sat again. I had meetings, The Boys had homework. I was looking forward to a quiet dinner for the two of us. At 2:00 I received a text from the ex asking if I could pick The Boys up from school. I agreed (since I was already there and all). He then said he would let me know later when he would pick them up as his gf is out of town & he was going to be stuck on a job for a while. I let him know I had a 5:00 appointment & he replied that he didn't think he'd be by before then. Brought The Boys home and had them doing homework while Corky hung out and they whined that they would rather do it at their father's. I checked their work, made some corrective suggestions & got in another argument about what the assignment actually was. I sent another text to the ex reminding him that The Oldest was playing with the jazz band during the talent show, and he has the needed shirt. I said I could take The Boys to the gig, but I needed the shirt by 7:00. I left for therapy, where my therapist told me I need to find time to walk, or meditate - basically take better care of myself - and say no more often. On my way back, at 6:00, I sent another text to the ex asking if he was going to be able to make it to my house with the shirt by 7:00 (where he lives is 30 minutes in each direction). He said no, but would try to make the performance. Back home, pile The Boys into the car in a rush, say good-bye to Corky after she said she thought the talent show last year was horrible (and she was angry that our plans were upended). I shook my head and told her not to say that in front of the kids (mostly because that is exactly the reaction the ex has about these things). I bought The Boys fast food for dinner as they hadn't eaten while I was gone (I hate fast food), drove to the ex's and back and stayed at the talent show until it ended at 9:00. I still hadn't sent the e-mail, and I am so grateful that my VP did it for me. By the time I got The Boys showered and in bed it was after 10:00. I am so wiped out and just need to sleep - hopefully not to awaken at 1:15 like last night and stay up for 90 minutes. Sending thoughts to the universe that the morning will sail smoothly.
Not sure if I feel better now having written it all down, but at least it isn't still in my head...
Monday, February 2, 2015
Monday Morning Weekend Wrap Up
This was supposed to be a lay low and relaxing kind of weekend, and it only kind of was. Corky was sick, starting Wednesday night, and the cold carried into the weekend. I didn't think we were going to see each other at all, but we did, and that helped me to be less stressed out. I hate being home alone, without Corky and The Boys at night.
Friday
After school, I picked up The Boys, took them to their old elementary school to drop off some clay for the kiln. The Youngest had presented his Egypt project in the morning, and it involved people creating cartouches in clay. Dropped The Boys at their father's and came home to turn around and go play bingo with some friends. I had no idea how late bingo ran. I didn't win, not anything, but it was mostly fun. I was on the end of the row, and missed out on too much conversation. After bingo, a few of us went to a really late dinner with lots of post party drunks. It ended up with me mediating another couple's communication issues and fighting. I like both members of the couple, but the way they relate to each other is horrible, and they are not good together. They fight, and not fairly at all. And one of them wants a kid, while the other does not. They try to get the other one to change, and both resent the other for that. Didn't get home until 2am.
Saturday
I slept in and then felt food hungover for a few hours until I went back to bed for another 3 hours. Corky came over after work and we ran a couple of errands, and then we just hung out at home and watched a movie, going to bed at a decent hour.
Sunday
Got up and waked for a couple of hours, and finally felt like my body was back on track. cleaned a bit in the garage, did laundry, ran errands and hung out for a few hours at home waiting for The Boys return, which was supposed to be by 8pm. At 8:25 I sent a text to them, their father and his gf to ask if they were on the way. They replied a few minutes later that they were just leaving the Superbowl party (at least a 30 minute drive). This is a constant bone I have to pick with their father, because I was nearly certain all of The Boys' homework was not completed, and they had not taken showers. I checked the homework and it had been finished, which pleasantly surprised me. After showers, that put them in bed well after 10pm, because the ex wouldn't leave and felt like visiting... Or, I could make them get up early after staying up late all weekend. So now I have the pleasure of handling grumpy pubescent boys. Lucky me.
Friday
After school, I picked up The Boys, took them to their old elementary school to drop off some clay for the kiln. The Youngest had presented his Egypt project in the morning, and it involved people creating cartouches in clay. Dropped The Boys at their father's and came home to turn around and go play bingo with some friends. I had no idea how late bingo ran. I didn't win, not anything, but it was mostly fun. I was on the end of the row, and missed out on too much conversation. After bingo, a few of us went to a really late dinner with lots of post party drunks. It ended up with me mediating another couple's communication issues and fighting. I like both members of the couple, but the way they relate to each other is horrible, and they are not good together. They fight, and not fairly at all. And one of them wants a kid, while the other does not. They try to get the other one to change, and both resent the other for that. Didn't get home until 2am.
Saturday
I slept in and then felt food hungover for a few hours until I went back to bed for another 3 hours. Corky came over after work and we ran a couple of errands, and then we just hung out at home and watched a movie, going to bed at a decent hour.
Sunday
Got up and waked for a couple of hours, and finally felt like my body was back on track. cleaned a bit in the garage, did laundry, ran errands and hung out for a few hours at home waiting for The Boys return, which was supposed to be by 8pm. At 8:25 I sent a text to them, their father and his gf to ask if they were on the way. They replied a few minutes later that they were just leaving the Superbowl party (at least a 30 minute drive). This is a constant bone I have to pick with their father, because I was nearly certain all of The Boys' homework was not completed, and they had not taken showers. I checked the homework and it had been finished, which pleasantly surprised me. After showers, that put them in bed well after 10pm, because the ex wouldn't leave and felt like visiting... Or, I could make them get up early after staying up late all weekend. So now I have the pleasure of handling grumpy pubescent boys. Lucky me.
Monday, January 26, 2015
Monday Morning Weekend Wrap Up
I am tired. This was a really busy weekend, exhausting emotionally, and a bit physically as well.
Friday
I had coffee in the morning with bff. We hadn't really spoken in a month or two, and she's been dealing with some crap in her family. Corky doesn't like that I had a crush on her ages ago, nor how she took advantage of that to get me to do work around her house. I miss talking to her though, and getting her input on various things in my life, and with The Boys. The Boys had a half day, and they went to their old elementary school after they got out and had lunch. I picked up some firewood that will need to age for a year. When The Boys got home, they unloaded the wood (which was heavy for me to load). Instead of opening the gate to carry the wood to the backyard, they threw it over the fence... I guess the testosterone has kicked in... We had spaghetti for dinner and hung around arguing about homework. Corky spent the night, which was so very nice.
Saturday
The Boys had homework. The Youngest had TONS of homework. A project that had been assigned before winter break is due on Friday, and NONE of that work had been done at his father's. He also had another project due Monday in the same class, spelling and vocabulary also due Monday. A science project due Friday (that I had him do a third of), plus his math portfolio writeup. The oldest had some work as well, but The Youngest was overwhelmed by the sheer amount of work. He managed to finish all but the vocabulary before bed time. Corky left mid afternoon to dog and house sit for a friend. The Boys and I watched Monty Python's Flying Circus, during which I fell asleep, and headed to bed.
Sunday
Up early and missing Corky. The Youngest finished his homework. More laundry and grocery shopping before heading to friends to test cook their new pizza oven. It was not as warm a day as I was hoping, but in front of the oven? Hot like the sun. It took some time to get the oven to temp, and once it was, we had eaten too many test pizzas... So we had salad and s'mores and went home. I'd been on my feet for hours on cement in converse low tops, and could only hobble to the car at that point. I'm getting too old for my dreams as a chef (HA!). Came home smelling like a camp fire, and The Boys showered and we watched the extras on Monty Python's Flying Circus.
Friday
I had coffee in the morning with bff. We hadn't really spoken in a month or two, and she's been dealing with some crap in her family. Corky doesn't like that I had a crush on her ages ago, nor how she took advantage of that to get me to do work around her house. I miss talking to her though, and getting her input on various things in my life, and with The Boys. The Boys had a half day, and they went to their old elementary school after they got out and had lunch. I picked up some firewood that will need to age for a year. When The Boys got home, they unloaded the wood (which was heavy for me to load). Instead of opening the gate to carry the wood to the backyard, they threw it over the fence... I guess the testosterone has kicked in... We had spaghetti for dinner and hung around arguing about homework. Corky spent the night, which was so very nice.
Saturday
The Boys had homework. The Youngest had TONS of homework. A project that had been assigned before winter break is due on Friday, and NONE of that work had been done at his father's. He also had another project due Monday in the same class, spelling and vocabulary also due Monday. A science project due Friday (that I had him do a third of), plus his math portfolio writeup. The oldest had some work as well, but The Youngest was overwhelmed by the sheer amount of work. He managed to finish all but the vocabulary before bed time. Corky left mid afternoon to dog and house sit for a friend. The Boys and I watched Monty Python's Flying Circus, during which I fell asleep, and headed to bed.
Sunday
Up early and missing Corky. The Youngest finished his homework. More laundry and grocery shopping before heading to friends to test cook their new pizza oven. It was not as warm a day as I was hoping, but in front of the oven? Hot like the sun. It took some time to get the oven to temp, and once it was, we had eaten too many test pizzas... So we had salad and s'mores and went home. I'd been on my feet for hours on cement in converse low tops, and could only hobble to the car at that point. I'm getting too old for my dreams as a chef (HA!). Came home smelling like a camp fire, and The Boys showered and we watched the extras on Monty Python's Flying Circus.
Monday, January 12, 2015
Monday Morning Weekend Wrap Up
Just a warning that this may turn to a rant at any poin in the writing, and it is not to be taken personally by anyone real or imagined.
Friday
The kids and I walked through their grades and missing assignments. The Oldest pulled his grades out of the gutter (at this point in time) However, he is still needing to improve by quite alot. So we wrote out what was needed to be completed over the weekend, and I took all screens away, with their ability to earn an hour per day for screens. They whined and bitched and moaned and threw fits worthy of Verruca Salt. In the end, they got no screen time for all the whining. Instead, they played together, and we played Monopoly as a family. I made a tri tip in the crock pot, and we added mashed potatoes and gravy, and broccoli and cauliflower. The Boys called it a hit, and Corky enjoyed it too. I had a salad. When we went to bed I removed the UVerse box, the Xbox controllers, the remote controls, and changed the passwords on all devices.
Saturday
Morning, and The Boys were pissed off because they were going to do what they always do, which is get up quietly and sneak onto screens of some sort. They said I was cold for doing what I did, and I explained that no screens, means exactly that. Corky made fantastic pancakes for breakfast. The Boys whined some more that there was nothing to do, and they were going to be bored, and then threw in my face that at their dad's house, they get half a day Saturday on screen, and then are chased outside for the other half of the day. I countered that I was not going to spend my Sunday fighting over homework. It was all to be done Saturday. You know what? It was done. All of the homework. Plus, rooms cleaned, bathroom cleaned, and two tie blankets for charity done. We joined a new Meetup for committed gay couples (and their families) at a good restaurant and enjoyed the meal and meeting new people. Corky was uncomfortable in the crowd, and was quiet. The Boys were relatively well behaved, and I enjoyed myself.
Sunday
Grape Nuts and bananas for breakfast was exactly what I needed. I got The Boys outside, mowing the front and side yards, and clearing out the piles of debris in the back. We still can't start the lawnmower, so they are push mowing. We cleaned out the garage, hauling a bunch of stuff to the thrift store. We assembled the bunk beds and took pics for a Craig's List ad. My Nephew came over to finish his video to send to soccer scouts and college coaches. Corky was out of sorts most of the day, and we broke down before she went home for the night. We are okay, and all still learning to live together, and there are bumps along the way.
Also this weekend, I was finally able to finish photoshopping our NOH8 photos:
I hope you all have a fantastic week.
If you are wondering if I am living under a rock for not mentioning the insane terror attacks in various parts of the world (France, Syria, Colorado, Nigeria), or the death of Leelah Alcorn (or many, so many other LGBT youth), or all of the other horrors and atrocities of our world; I am not. What I am choosing is to reflect on my own life, and my individual impact on this world as a whole. I am trying to protect myself, and my empathetic heart from breaking at all of the loss. I can only live in the moment of sadness and loss for just that, the moment. I cannot allow the fear, sadness to build in my heart. There is already more love in my heart that I send to each of you.
Friday
The kids and I walked through their grades and missing assignments. The Oldest pulled his grades out of the gutter (at this point in time) However, he is still needing to improve by quite alot. So we wrote out what was needed to be completed over the weekend, and I took all screens away, with their ability to earn an hour per day for screens. They whined and bitched and moaned and threw fits worthy of Verruca Salt. In the end, they got no screen time for all the whining. Instead, they played together, and we played Monopoly as a family. I made a tri tip in the crock pot, and we added mashed potatoes and gravy, and broccoli and cauliflower. The Boys called it a hit, and Corky enjoyed it too. I had a salad. When we went to bed I removed the UVerse box, the Xbox controllers, the remote controls, and changed the passwords on all devices.
Saturday
Morning, and The Boys were pissed off because they were going to do what they always do, which is get up quietly and sneak onto screens of some sort. They said I was cold for doing what I did, and I explained that no screens, means exactly that. Corky made fantastic pancakes for breakfast. The Boys whined some more that there was nothing to do, and they were going to be bored, and then threw in my face that at their dad's house, they get half a day Saturday on screen, and then are chased outside for the other half of the day. I countered that I was not going to spend my Sunday fighting over homework. It was all to be done Saturday. You know what? It was done. All of the homework. Plus, rooms cleaned, bathroom cleaned, and two tie blankets for charity done. We joined a new Meetup for committed gay couples (and their families) at a good restaurant and enjoyed the meal and meeting new people. Corky was uncomfortable in the crowd, and was quiet. The Boys were relatively well behaved, and I enjoyed myself.
Sunday
Grape Nuts and bananas for breakfast was exactly what I needed. I got The Boys outside, mowing the front and side yards, and clearing out the piles of debris in the back. We still can't start the lawnmower, so they are push mowing. We cleaned out the garage, hauling a bunch of stuff to the thrift store. We assembled the bunk beds and took pics for a Craig's List ad. My Nephew came over to finish his video to send to soccer scouts and college coaches. Corky was out of sorts most of the day, and we broke down before she went home for the night. We are okay, and all still learning to live together, and there are bumps along the way.
Also this weekend, I was finally able to finish photoshopping our NOH8 photos:
I hope you all have a fantastic week.
If you are wondering if I am living under a rock for not mentioning the insane terror attacks in various parts of the world (France, Syria, Colorado, Nigeria), or the death of Leelah Alcorn (or many, so many other LGBT youth), or all of the other horrors and atrocities of our world; I am not. What I am choosing is to reflect on my own life, and my individual impact on this world as a whole. I am trying to protect myself, and my empathetic heart from breaking at all of the loss. I can only live in the moment of sadness and loss for just that, the moment. I cannot allow the fear, sadness to build in my heart. There is already more love in my heart that I send to each of you.
Monday, January 5, 2015
Monday Morning Holiday Wrap Up
This was a nice weekend, and fairly relaxing after the prep, party and clean up for NYE.
Friday
Sex. Lots of sex. I missed it terribly after so long (not actually a long time, it just seemed so). Corky and I lazed about the house and cleaned and ate more cheese than we should have. Tried to get her iPhone set up, but were unable to get her pics and contacts transferred. The person at the retail store was of zero help & sent us to do it on our own. spent time in the evening trying to get the transfer complete and with customer support, who referred us to the retail store...
Saturday
Out all day with Corky and her roommate. Started in a town we thought would have a cute downtown (it didn't), and ended up in another town we knew had tons of antique shops. Bought a set of fireplace tools and a wine rack (since we have the equivalent of 2 cases of wine left after NYE). All meals out all day long, but it was a ton of walking in the frigid temps and fun too. Went back to retail store, and they were mostly still unhelpful, but they did manage to get her contacts across, and then tried to sell us a $100 adapter with micro SD chip to transfer the photos to the computer. I found the adapter alone on line for under $4...
Sunday
Slept in (for about 11 hours) and it felt glorious! Up and laundry, and groceries, and spending some time with Corky before The Boys came home. The Oldest bought an ipad mini with his saved $$$, and I'm not sure I am happy about that. I seriously do not think he needs another screen to be taken away because of his grades... He bought it while at his father's, so I had no say in it. We'll see how the week progresses with The Oldest's promises that work was actually turned in prior to break.
Friday
Sex. Lots of sex. I missed it terribly after so long (not actually a long time, it just seemed so). Corky and I lazed about the house and cleaned and ate more cheese than we should have. Tried to get her iPhone set up, but were unable to get her pics and contacts transferred. The person at the retail store was of zero help & sent us to do it on our own. spent time in the evening trying to get the transfer complete and with customer support, who referred us to the retail store...
Saturday
Out all day with Corky and her roommate. Started in a town we thought would have a cute downtown (it didn't), and ended up in another town we knew had tons of antique shops. Bought a set of fireplace tools and a wine rack (since we have the equivalent of 2 cases of wine left after NYE). All meals out all day long, but it was a ton of walking in the frigid temps and fun too. Went back to retail store, and they were mostly still unhelpful, but they did manage to get her contacts across, and then tried to sell us a $100 adapter with micro SD chip to transfer the photos to the computer. I found the adapter alone on line for under $4...
Sunday
Slept in (for about 11 hours) and it felt glorious! Up and laundry, and groceries, and spending some time with Corky before The Boys came home. The Oldest bought an ipad mini with his saved $$$, and I'm not sure I am happy about that. I seriously do not think he needs another screen to be taken away because of his grades... He bought it while at his father's, so I had no say in it. We'll see how the week progresses with The Oldest's promises that work was actually turned in prior to break.
Monday, December 29, 2014
Post Christmas / Pre New Years time
Christmas was fine. Different (as they all have seemed to be recently) but fine. I really missed The Boys, and cried a hell of a lot over the 24th and 25th. They have been with me since Christmas, and I love having their noisy energy here. I also love having time off of work to just be with them.
This is typically a week of quiet reflection for me. This year my thoughts turn to the future. Where will I be a year from now? Will my divorce finally be final? Will my taxes be paid off? Will I be just as happy as I am in the moment right now? Will I still be loved? Will The Boys pull their grades out of the gutter? Will their minds reside in the gutter instead? Am I raising respectful young men? How will The Oldest (and by extention, I) handle High School? Will The Youngest find a passion that will carry him forward? How will I do living with Corky? Will my craziness drive her to the arms and bed of another? All mysteries yet to reveal the answers.
What I do know is that I will still love my life, the boring ruts, and the unexpected ups and downs. Corky will likely still be in my life (and my house), The Boys will still be their crazy, loving, obnoxious selves. I will hopefully still be laughing to the point of peeing with Corky. The Cat and Dogs and Fish will all still be well taken care of and loved.
This is typically a week of quiet reflection for me. This year my thoughts turn to the future. Where will I be a year from now? Will my divorce finally be final? Will my taxes be paid off? Will I be just as happy as I am in the moment right now? Will I still be loved? Will The Boys pull their grades out of the gutter? Will their minds reside in the gutter instead? Am I raising respectful young men? How will The Oldest (and by extention, I) handle High School? Will The Youngest find a passion that will carry him forward? How will I do living with Corky? Will my craziness drive her to the arms and bed of another? All mysteries yet to reveal the answers.
What I do know is that I will still love my life, the boring ruts, and the unexpected ups and downs. Corky will likely still be in my life (and my house), The Boys will still be their crazy, loving, obnoxious selves. I will hopefully still be laughing to the point of peeing with Corky. The Cat and Dogs and Fish will all still be well taken care of and loved.
Monday, December 15, 2014
Monday Morning Weekend Wrap Up
Did not get everything done I'd hoped to. Such is a weekend here.
Friday
The Boys both have so many missing assignments it isn't even funny. The Youngest was doing really well for a long time, and who knows with The Oldest. His teachers do not update their websites, nor the assignment notifications, so even if the homework or classwork was complete and turned in, it auto updates on the due date in the grading system as a zero if the teacher hasn't entered it yet. 2 of The Oldest's teachers sent notes home that assignments weren't entered, but with a kid who needs to use his system and see reward for using it, this is made exceptionally difficult. Now he is on "why even bother because so and so doesn't even get their part done in a timely manner". I get it. This was my same frustration as a student in middle and high school. So it was an evening of homework.
Saturday
More homework, and me putting up the outdoor holiday decor, including the first inflatable in years - a Santa Dachshund. We bought a tree and put it up with lights. The evening was spent enjoying a local production of The Wizard of Oz which included various friends in the cast. It was a really well done production, and all 4 of us enjoyed it. Late bed time for us all.
Sunday
Slept in for a bit, and went out to breakfast. Got The Boys to clean up their rooms and their bathroom while Corky and I addressed all of the Christmas cards.Then it was off to My Folks' for The Boys' annual gingerbread house building. Corky and I finished the Christmas shopping, then it was home for a pizza dinner. The Oldest was disrespectful toward Corky, and she left in a foul mood. All of it put me in an equally foul mood. The tiredness, sugar crash and holiday stress is starting to get to me.
Friday
The Boys both have so many missing assignments it isn't even funny. The Youngest was doing really well for a long time, and who knows with The Oldest. His teachers do not update their websites, nor the assignment notifications, so even if the homework or classwork was complete and turned in, it auto updates on the due date in the grading system as a zero if the teacher hasn't entered it yet. 2 of The Oldest's teachers sent notes home that assignments weren't entered, but with a kid who needs to use his system and see reward for using it, this is made exceptionally difficult. Now he is on "why even bother because so and so doesn't even get their part done in a timely manner". I get it. This was my same frustration as a student in middle and high school. So it was an evening of homework.
Saturday
More homework, and me putting up the outdoor holiday decor, including the first inflatable in years - a Santa Dachshund. We bought a tree and put it up with lights. The evening was spent enjoying a local production of The Wizard of Oz which included various friends in the cast. It was a really well done production, and all 4 of us enjoyed it. Late bed time for us all.
Sunday
Slept in for a bit, and went out to breakfast. Got The Boys to clean up their rooms and their bathroom while Corky and I addressed all of the Christmas cards.Then it was off to My Folks' for The Boys' annual gingerbread house building. Corky and I finished the Christmas shopping, then it was home for a pizza dinner. The Oldest was disrespectful toward Corky, and she left in a foul mood. All of it put me in an equally foul mood. The tiredness, sugar crash and holiday stress is starting to get to me.
Tuesday, December 2, 2014
Happy 14th Birthday to The Oldest
Wow, 14. That is definitely into the teen years, and it shows. I am so very proud of the young man into which you are growing. You are kind hearted and loud, easy to smile and talented. Just thinking about you makes me smile. You will always be my beautiful boy, and I want nothing more than you know how very much you are loved.
From your pre-freckle days when you actually loved dill pickles:
To this year's school photo, freckles, braces, and shaving your face:
Happy Birthday Kiddo! Yes, I know that you are significantly taller than me now.
From your pre-freckle days when you actually loved dill pickles:
To this year's school photo, freckles, braces, and shaving your face:
Happy Birthday Kiddo! Yes, I know that you are significantly taller than me now.
Monday, December 1, 2014
Monday Morning Thanksgiving Weekend Wrap Up
Yep, this was Thanksgiving in the US. Yep, we celebrated. Yep, The Boys had the whole week off of school. No, they did not finish their homework before arriving at my house on Wednesday afternoon after spending a week at the ex'. Oh and I only had Thursday off of work, though to be fair the rest of the week was really slow, allowing me to get in on some training I'd been meaning to do.
Thursday
Thanksgiving at my Sister's. I had green salad and pumpkin pie to bring. Totally loved waking up late morning, not having to prep a massive meal and clean. I need to thank her again for hosting. Corky was at one of her sister's homes too, and I missed being able to spend the day with her. The Boys were sort of bored because The Nephews were on phones and xbox all day playing what The Youngest didn't want to play.
Friday
Wanted to decorate for Christmas, but The Boys still had homework before Monday, so it was Homework Friday, instead of Black Friday (though they would argue that it's the same thing). The Youngest made blueberry scones for breakfast which were delicious.
The rest of the day and evening was spent fighting over homework and rehearsal. I nearly lost my voice at one point. Corky chose not to spend the night, and I missed her.
Saturday
All homework was finished, we had breakfast, cleaned house and decorated! This is the first holiday season in this house, so we had to decide where everything was going, including the tree. Figured it all out and I think it looks good. Afternoon and evening were spent making ugly Christmas sweater cookies pictured below:
We watched It's Christmas Charlie Brown and The Birdcage, and just enjoyed each other and a nice fire.
Sunday
Slept in for a bit and had a nice relaxing breakfast before more trombone rehearsal. Eventually we worked our way to My Folks' to celebrate The Oldest's birthday (which happens tomorrow). Snacks, and chicken spaghetti, salad, Swiss chard, and Mary bread for dinner. chocolate cake with chocolate whipped cream frosting and Mexican Train Dominoes after dinner. When we went around the table, we all pointed out why we adore The Oldest, and I made it 2/3 of the way through before tears started spilling down my cheeks. I cry at every single one of these. Every one. I am always so touched by the outpouring of love within our family that I can't help but cry. Corky went home after The Boys showered and I already miss having her here.
I hope you all have a wonderful week.
Thursday
Thanksgiving at my Sister's. I had green salad and pumpkin pie to bring. Totally loved waking up late morning, not having to prep a massive meal and clean. I need to thank her again for hosting. Corky was at one of her sister's homes too, and I missed being able to spend the day with her. The Boys were sort of bored because The Nephews were on phones and xbox all day playing what The Youngest didn't want to play.
Friday
Wanted to decorate for Christmas, but The Boys still had homework before Monday, so it was Homework Friday, instead of Black Friday (though they would argue that it's the same thing). The Youngest made blueberry scones for breakfast which were delicious.
The rest of the day and evening was spent fighting over homework and rehearsal. I nearly lost my voice at one point. Corky chose not to spend the night, and I missed her.
Saturday
All homework was finished, we had breakfast, cleaned house and decorated! This is the first holiday season in this house, so we had to decide where everything was going, including the tree. Figured it all out and I think it looks good. Afternoon and evening were spent making ugly Christmas sweater cookies pictured below:
We watched It's Christmas Charlie Brown and The Birdcage, and just enjoyed each other and a nice fire.
Sunday
Slept in for a bit and had a nice relaxing breakfast before more trombone rehearsal. Eventually we worked our way to My Folks' to celebrate The Oldest's birthday (which happens tomorrow). Snacks, and chicken spaghetti, salad, Swiss chard, and Mary bread for dinner. chocolate cake with chocolate whipped cream frosting and Mexican Train Dominoes after dinner. When we went around the table, we all pointed out why we adore The Oldest, and I made it 2/3 of the way through before tears started spilling down my cheeks. I cry at every single one of these. Every one. I am always so touched by the outpouring of love within our family that I can't help but cry. Corky went home after The Boys showered and I already miss having her here.
I hope you all have a wonderful week.
Monday, November 17, 2014
Monday Morning Weekend Wrap Up
Well this weekend left me emotionally tired and with a sore throat from all the yelling going on.
Friday
The Youngest worked a bit on his MAJOR project. Not enough to my mind, but at least he is moving on it. In the attempt to get him to a fiction genre, I got him started on Stephen King's The Green Mile. I remember reading my mom's King books at that age, and falling in love with them. The Oldest claimed he had no homework, but when I checked, he had a ton of work past due as well as several items due Monday. Homework weekend it would be... We watched Close Encounters in the evening before bed, and The Youngest enjoyed it the most, while The Oldest claimed it would give him nightmares.
Saturday
Morning found us at the kitchen table, eating a delicious breakfast by Corky, and already the fights over homework began. The plea deals, the claims of my evil nature. Yes, I understand that there are things you would rather do. I also would rather not sit here making sure you do your homework. No I am not on a mission to ruin your life by making you do the work you should have already done and turned in. Yes, if you actually use the system you set up, you would get everything turned in on time. No, it will not in fact take you longer to do all of your work. The length of time it has taken you to complain is longer than the actual work involved. I worked on a few projects hanging stuff on the walls of my bedroom, taking down an old computer, rewiring the modem, router, printer, micro cell and gateway, but then The Boys would get distracted and stop working, which meant I was stopping my work to check on them, remind them to stay focused, that they were not finished with it all, check the things they did complete, make them revise those items to their teachers' standards, and signing off once complete. And on it went all day with a short lunch break, and a dinner out celebrating my first boyfriend's 50th birthday. It was a great evening.
Sunday
And back to the grind of homework battles. Did not leave the house or the sight of The Boys until everything was complete at 2:00. Then grocery shopped, came home and taped The Youngest doing a project for History and English on Mesopotamia. Had a few bloopers, and finished up about time to make dinner. Corky and I also tackled the credenza in my kitchen, reorganizing it to fit the china and crystal and freeing up space for coffee, tea and associated mugs. Got out my blue items and they went in the ledge above the kitchen window where they are nicely set apart by the white shelving and wall. Corky did all of the laundry and folding of clothes during all of this and had The Boys clean their rooms and bathroom, vacuum and mop while I was shopping. There were no screens today and despite The Boys claiming there was absolutely nothing to do, they managed to entertain themselves for the evening, and even woke me up at 8:30 for their bed time. I'd fallen asleep on the couch, nearly as soon as I sat down.
Friday
The Youngest worked a bit on his MAJOR project. Not enough to my mind, but at least he is moving on it. In the attempt to get him to a fiction genre, I got him started on Stephen King's The Green Mile. I remember reading my mom's King books at that age, and falling in love with them. The Oldest claimed he had no homework, but when I checked, he had a ton of work past due as well as several items due Monday. Homework weekend it would be... We watched Close Encounters in the evening before bed, and The Youngest enjoyed it the most, while The Oldest claimed it would give him nightmares.
Saturday
Morning found us at the kitchen table, eating a delicious breakfast by Corky, and already the fights over homework began. The plea deals, the claims of my evil nature. Yes, I understand that there are things you would rather do. I also would rather not sit here making sure you do your homework. No I am not on a mission to ruin your life by making you do the work you should have already done and turned in. Yes, if you actually use the system you set up, you would get everything turned in on time. No, it will not in fact take you longer to do all of your work. The length of time it has taken you to complain is longer than the actual work involved. I worked on a few projects hanging stuff on the walls of my bedroom, taking down an old computer, rewiring the modem, router, printer, micro cell and gateway, but then The Boys would get distracted and stop working, which meant I was stopping my work to check on them, remind them to stay focused, that they were not finished with it all, check the things they did complete, make them revise those items to their teachers' standards, and signing off once complete. And on it went all day with a short lunch break, and a dinner out celebrating my first boyfriend's 50th birthday. It was a great evening.
Sunday
And back to the grind of homework battles. Did not leave the house or the sight of The Boys until everything was complete at 2:00. Then grocery shopped, came home and taped The Youngest doing a project for History and English on Mesopotamia. Had a few bloopers, and finished up about time to make dinner. Corky and I also tackled the credenza in my kitchen, reorganizing it to fit the china and crystal and freeing up space for coffee, tea and associated mugs. Got out my blue items and they went in the ledge above the kitchen window where they are nicely set apart by the white shelving and wall. Corky did all of the laundry and folding of clothes during all of this and had The Boys clean their rooms and bathroom, vacuum and mop while I was shopping. There were no screens today and despite The Boys claiming there was absolutely nothing to do, they managed to entertain themselves for the evening, and even woke me up at 8:30 for their bed time. I'd fallen asleep on the couch, nearly as soon as I sat down.
Friday, November 14, 2014
It really has been that kind of week
That week. You know the one. The week you are just waiting for the other shoe to drop. The one you can't wait to end because you need to reset your mojo.
Let's review
Monday
No school for The Boys - first day of all day homework fights because they did none / told their father they have none. Spent time sending e-mails to various teachers in order to get the assignments that are missing from The Oldest.
Tuesday
No school for The Boys, again homework battles. Received answers to e-mails from yesterday and Both Boys finished all of the work. The youngest had an appointment with a reading specialist because the ex wanted to find out what is going on with him. The specialist came to the same conclusion I had a while ago. The kid needs to read more, and if we find him a genre he likes, he will. Basically he's fine, and needs to actually read. While out, Corky opened the garage door and it broke beyond my capability to repair. Also, it was stuck open, and I was nervous about leaving my house with it in that condition. Called landlord and was told their handyman would call. Sent follow up e-mail with pictures to say that I have never heard from nor seen this person on the previous instances when repairs were needed, and I would be happy to have it repaired and take the amount off next month's rent. Was called and told he would be here tomorrow afternoon. During the call, landlord said the problem was the spring had broken. I stated that was not the case, what the actual problem was, which was documented in my e-mail, as well as photographed.
Wednesday
Handyman no showed (not surprised), but was stuck at my house all day and had Corky hang there in the evening so I could go to Parent Teacher Conferences. Dun dun duuuuunnnnnn. 2 kids, meeting with 6 different teachers. The comments were in only a couple of threads.
1. The Oldest is brilliant, we wish his grades reflected that.
2. The Oldest spends his class time talking to members of the opposite gender instead of paying attention.
3. The youngest needs to read more which will build his self confidence.
Thursday
Put on my underwear backward and wore it that way all day - half of the day because I didn't realize, the other half because I was too busy to get undressed. Was on work calls form 8-11 in the morning. Called landlord during the short break between calls. He was surprised that handyman no showed, called him and called back 5 minutes later to say he'd be here in an hour. He showed up 15 minutes before I had to leave to drive on a field trip. Locked up and left him at the house to take the jazz band to a gig. got home after dropping the band back at school, and the garage door is now fixed and operational. In the evening we went out. Had a glass of sparkling wine. Got sucked into the vortex of a particularly needy friend who refuses to own who she is... Tiring and Corky felt ignored. Meanwhile, another woman was flirting with Corky...
Friday
Half day for The Boys. Dropped and broke a bottle of Thai peanut sauce in the garage in my search for salad dressing that I swear I bought two weeks ago. Ate the salad anyway because I was famished. The Youngest threw a huge fit because he thought he had a weekend without homework when I reminded him that he still has a MAJOR project due next week, which he has been working on for three weeks already, and while he has done a great job on what he has, he's only about halfway complete, and he needs to give himself the week days to just polish it. It basically has to be complete before he goes to school Monday. You would think I was trying to kill him with a dull spoon for the amount of wailing he was doing. Really. Oscar worthy.
Let's review
Monday
No school for The Boys - first day of all day homework fights because they did none / told their father they have none. Spent time sending e-mails to various teachers in order to get the assignments that are missing from The Oldest.
Tuesday
No school for The Boys, again homework battles. Received answers to e-mails from yesterday and Both Boys finished all of the work. The youngest had an appointment with a reading specialist because the ex wanted to find out what is going on with him. The specialist came to the same conclusion I had a while ago. The kid needs to read more, and if we find him a genre he likes, he will. Basically he's fine, and needs to actually read. While out, Corky opened the garage door and it broke beyond my capability to repair. Also, it was stuck open, and I was nervous about leaving my house with it in that condition. Called landlord and was told their handyman would call. Sent follow up e-mail with pictures to say that I have never heard from nor seen this person on the previous instances when repairs were needed, and I would be happy to have it repaired and take the amount off next month's rent. Was called and told he would be here tomorrow afternoon. During the call, landlord said the problem was the spring had broken. I stated that was not the case, what the actual problem was, which was documented in my e-mail, as well as photographed.
Wednesday
Handyman no showed (not surprised), but was stuck at my house all day and had Corky hang there in the evening so I could go to Parent Teacher Conferences. Dun dun duuuuunnnnnn. 2 kids, meeting with 6 different teachers. The comments were in only a couple of threads.
1. The Oldest is brilliant, we wish his grades reflected that.
2. The Oldest spends his class time talking to members of the opposite gender instead of paying attention.
3. The youngest needs to read more which will build his self confidence.
Thursday
Put on my underwear backward and wore it that way all day - half of the day because I didn't realize, the other half because I was too busy to get undressed. Was on work calls form 8-11 in the morning. Called landlord during the short break between calls. He was surprised that handyman no showed, called him and called back 5 minutes later to say he'd be here in an hour. He showed up 15 minutes before I had to leave to drive on a field trip. Locked up and left him at the house to take the jazz band to a gig. got home after dropping the band back at school, and the garage door is now fixed and operational. In the evening we went out. Had a glass of sparkling wine. Got sucked into the vortex of a particularly needy friend who refuses to own who she is... Tiring and Corky felt ignored. Meanwhile, another woman was flirting with Corky...
Friday
Half day for The Boys. Dropped and broke a bottle of Thai peanut sauce in the garage in my search for salad dressing that I swear I bought two weeks ago. Ate the salad anyway because I was famished. The Youngest threw a huge fit because he thought he had a weekend without homework when I reminded him that he still has a MAJOR project due next week, which he has been working on for three weeks already, and while he has done a great job on what he has, he's only about halfway complete, and he needs to give himself the week days to just polish it. It basically has to be complete before he goes to school Monday. You would think I was trying to kill him with a dull spoon for the amount of wailing he was doing. Really. Oscar worthy.
Monday, November 10, 2014
Monday Morning Weekend Wrap Up
Beautiful weekend - high temp was 90 F. Busy-ish and just right.
Friday
I won tickets earlier in the week to see the opening night of CHICAGO The Broadway Musical on tour in San Francisco. I had to pick up The Boys from school, and meet their father at my house at about the time we got back from the school. Following work, Corky and I had an early local dinner and rode BART to the theater. The cast was amazing. We ran into an old co-worker of Corky's, and his date, and I spied in the audience a former friend, whom had an inappropriate relationship with the ex, while we were still (I thought happily) married. She was with her husband, and I was in no mood to visit... We hightailed it home after the show and into bed late, "All That Jazz" ringing in our ears.
Saturday
Song of the day was "Cell Block Tango". Slept in and had a light breakfast before heading out grocery shopping and looking at stores for inspiration for this year's Holiday cards. Finding none, we continue to ponder. Attended the local Veterans celebration where the middle school jazz band played a few songs. The Oldest had two solos and they sounded great. The Youngest was left at their father's with another boy a year younger. I do not think 10 and 11 are old enough to be alone for a couple of hours. My opinions mean little to their father however, and fall on deaf or angry ears. And so it goes. Finished the grocery shopping and had some alone time with Corky before heading out to dinner with a couple of friends. They were particularly bickersome, and so it was not as pleasant as it could have been. Spending time when they are like this leads to the inevitable comparison to our relationship and the gratitude we have for one another, and for how unlike them we happen to be (in general and in how we communicate to one another, and how we reflect our relationship to the public). Early bed time felt great.
Sunday
Song of the day was "Razzle Dazzle". Woke up to my darling Corky making coffee and cinnamon rolls. Delicious. Also, spent some time cuddling in bed before getting up and ready for the NOH8 photo shoot in San Francisco. Picked up the boys and headed out to the city. We arrived at the time it began and only had to wait about an hour before having our pictures taken, first Corky and I, and then with The Boys. Met a couple of friends there and had a late lunch, then wandered Union Square for a bit, dessert, more wandering then home. The Boys have Monday and Tuesday off of school, and of course did ZERO homework during their stay at their father's. So as usual, it is up to me to be the strict one and make them do all their work over the next two days. I also know they didn't sleep with any particular schedule, so I get to do that too...
Friday
I won tickets earlier in the week to see the opening night of CHICAGO The Broadway Musical on tour in San Francisco. I had to pick up The Boys from school, and meet their father at my house at about the time we got back from the school. Following work, Corky and I had an early local dinner and rode BART to the theater. The cast was amazing. We ran into an old co-worker of Corky's, and his date, and I spied in the audience a former friend, whom had an inappropriate relationship with the ex, while we were still (I thought happily) married. She was with her husband, and I was in no mood to visit... We hightailed it home after the show and into bed late, "All That Jazz" ringing in our ears.
Saturday
Song of the day was "Cell Block Tango". Slept in and had a light breakfast before heading out grocery shopping and looking at stores for inspiration for this year's Holiday cards. Finding none, we continue to ponder. Attended the local Veterans celebration where the middle school jazz band played a few songs. The Oldest had two solos and they sounded great. The Youngest was left at their father's with another boy a year younger. I do not think 10 and 11 are old enough to be alone for a couple of hours. My opinions mean little to their father however, and fall on deaf or angry ears. And so it goes. Finished the grocery shopping and had some alone time with Corky before heading out to dinner with a couple of friends. They were particularly bickersome, and so it was not as pleasant as it could have been. Spending time when they are like this leads to the inevitable comparison to our relationship and the gratitude we have for one another, and for how unlike them we happen to be (in general and in how we communicate to one another, and how we reflect our relationship to the public). Early bed time felt great.
Sunday
Song of the day was "Razzle Dazzle". Woke up to my darling Corky making coffee and cinnamon rolls. Delicious. Also, spent some time cuddling in bed before getting up and ready for the NOH8 photo shoot in San Francisco. Picked up the boys and headed out to the city. We arrived at the time it began and only had to wait about an hour before having our pictures taken, first Corky and I, and then with The Boys. Met a couple of friends there and had a late lunch, then wandered Union Square for a bit, dessert, more wandering then home. The Boys have Monday and Tuesday off of school, and of course did ZERO homework during their stay at their father's. So as usual, it is up to me to be the strict one and make them do all their work over the next two days. I also know they didn't sleep with any particular schedule, so I get to do that too...
Tuesday, November 4, 2014
Monday started good
Late Sunday night, I found out that NOH8 is doing another shoot in San Francisco this weekend, and I want Corky to come with me. I was hoping The Boys could come too, which their father agreed to today, as long as their images are not used for advertising (which they are not). In the morning I found out that I'd won tickets to see Chicago the musical! Free B-Way tix? YESSSSSSSS!!!!! So it looks like a bunch of trips to SF this weekend, but for totally awesome reasons.
Of course, my winning high could not be sustained all day and into the night. After school brought monumental homework battles, tears, shouting, crying, whining and arguments worthy of a Supreme Court briefing. During the arguments, I fielded a call from a friend, missed two calls from Corky, and was being peppered by so many questions from all places, that I was unable to then also put together a decent dinner for us. So I escaped to In-n-Out, picked up food and came home. During the drive, I called my mom. and then called Corky as I'd been short with her on the phone. I just wanted someone to talk me off the cliff edge, tell me it would be okay. What I got was an irritated gf, who accused me of rewarding The Boys with take out food after they behaved so badly. I explained this was not for their benefit, but mine. I was going to seriously lose my mind if I had to add any one more thing to think about and keep track of, which included dinner. I was already on The Youngest for 6 separate things due this week, from the spelling test and vocab due tomorrow, the write up for a story they are reading due Wed, a Middle East test due Thursday, and a science study guide (the class in which he just obtained an F quarter grade) due Friday. I am working on getting his week set up and splitting up the larger tasks and assignments. He has a major assignment due in a couple of weeks, so I am also getting him to do some research each day. That would have been plenty, but The Oldest determined that he does not know how to structure a complete sentence, and thus I was dictating (from his own notes and science study guide) complete sentences, which I had to remind him to capitalize, and appropriately punctuate. That was after the temper tantrum, and his insistence that he had no idea complete sentences were required (despite it being written on the study guide), Then his attestation that his teacher clarified that complete sentences were in fact not required, That was followed by my insistence that he write them anyway because he was no longer going to have the option or choice of doing the bare minimum. My requirement is complete sentences, even if he could get his teacher to tell me otherwise. Even then, he tried to get away with a few complete sentences, so I had to have him keep going back to actually write them out. In between this was me proof reading The Youngest's essay, adding clarifying questions, and reading those, adding follow up questions and sending him back to do the complete work ,instead of the bare minimum.
It was exhausting, and I was pretty upset with my gf, as I am sure she is certain that I am caving in on giving treats to The Boys, but there are days when my sanity is actually of utmost importance. I need my strength, because I know without a doubt that this is not the end of the battles. This is only the tip of the iceberg. It is absolutely going to get more difficult before it gets easier.
Of course, my winning high could not be sustained all day and into the night. After school brought monumental homework battles, tears, shouting, crying, whining and arguments worthy of a Supreme Court briefing. During the arguments, I fielded a call from a friend, missed two calls from Corky, and was being peppered by so many questions from all places, that I was unable to then also put together a decent dinner for us. So I escaped to In-n-Out, picked up food and came home. During the drive, I called my mom. and then called Corky as I'd been short with her on the phone. I just wanted someone to talk me off the cliff edge, tell me it would be okay. What I got was an irritated gf, who accused me of rewarding The Boys with take out food after they behaved so badly. I explained this was not for their benefit, but mine. I was going to seriously lose my mind if I had to add any one more thing to think about and keep track of, which included dinner. I was already on The Youngest for 6 separate things due this week, from the spelling test and vocab due tomorrow, the write up for a story they are reading due Wed, a Middle East test due Thursday, and a science study guide (the class in which he just obtained an F quarter grade) due Friday. I am working on getting his week set up and splitting up the larger tasks and assignments. He has a major assignment due in a couple of weeks, so I am also getting him to do some research each day. That would have been plenty, but The Oldest determined that he does not know how to structure a complete sentence, and thus I was dictating (from his own notes and science study guide) complete sentences, which I had to remind him to capitalize, and appropriately punctuate. That was after the temper tantrum, and his insistence that he had no idea complete sentences were required (despite it being written on the study guide), Then his attestation that his teacher clarified that complete sentences were in fact not required, That was followed by my insistence that he write them anyway because he was no longer going to have the option or choice of doing the bare minimum. My requirement is complete sentences, even if he could get his teacher to tell me otherwise. Even then, he tried to get away with a few complete sentences, so I had to have him keep going back to actually write them out. In between this was me proof reading The Youngest's essay, adding clarifying questions, and reading those, adding follow up questions and sending him back to do the complete work ,instead of the bare minimum.
It was exhausting, and I was pretty upset with my gf, as I am sure she is certain that I am caving in on giving treats to The Boys, but there are days when my sanity is actually of utmost importance. I need my strength, because I know without a doubt that this is not the end of the battles. This is only the tip of the iceberg. It is absolutely going to get more difficult before it gets easier.
Monday, November 3, 2014
Monday Morning Weekend Wrap Up (and my 700th post)
Another rather busy weekend, though not as bad as the previous two.
Friday
Halloween in the US. The Boys chose to spend the night at their father's. Corky and I went to a party at one of my friend's. It was okay, but got considerably better once we had some music to dance to. We were going to leave at 9:30, but ended up dancing past midnight! We had a few Moscow Mule's and a bunch of food. There was another party we were going to head to, but thought it might be too late by the time we got out of the other party. The theme for the party was good guys/bad guys, so we dressed as western heroes - I was Annie Oakley, and Corky was a white hat hero (Wyatt Earp, etc).
Saturday
Corky and I slept in. It was awesome to sleep like that after the week I'd had. We had pancakes and home fries for brunch, and The Boys came home at 11. Got The Youngest to organize the papers from the deepest recesses of his backpack before a friend came over, and The Oldest warmed up for a band performance in the late afternoon. Corky visited her dad, and I relaxed and did laundry. Went to the band review across the street to watch The Oldest perform the National Anthem, and watched a couple of bands before heading home for dinner. The Boys and I went back to catch the 3 high school bands I wanted to see, and the larger bands were so impressive! Saw friends and relatives and was able to visit and say hi. Came home and we all headed to bed. Corky was irritated because she wanted a family movie night, and I get it, but that is not what we do on weekends. In fact, it is rare that I am hanging about at home due to band events. And yes, there are band events over the next two weeks.
Sunday
Woke up after 11 hours of sleep ELEVEN hours. Felt Soooooo nice to sleep that long. Corky was making breakfast - egg sandwiches/egg muffins and sausage and potatoes. Very filling, and helped get me enough protein to handle this week's homework battle. Once homework was completed (hours later), I had The Boys clean their rooms and bathroom. During homework, I washed The Dogs, did laundry, changed out linens, and took a shower. Corky went home to get ready for the week. I did some shopping in the afternoon, came home and made a lasagna with shredded zucchini and whole wheat noodles. The Boys liked this one better than when I sliced the zucchini in. While dinner was in the oven I finish sanded the end table, and hopefully I'll be able to seal it tomorrow.
Friday
Halloween in the US. The Boys chose to spend the night at their father's. Corky and I went to a party at one of my friend's. It was okay, but got considerably better once we had some music to dance to. We were going to leave at 9:30, but ended up dancing past midnight! We had a few Moscow Mule's and a bunch of food. There was another party we were going to head to, but thought it might be too late by the time we got out of the other party. The theme for the party was good guys/bad guys, so we dressed as western heroes - I was Annie Oakley, and Corky was a white hat hero (Wyatt Earp, etc).
Saturday
Corky and I slept in. It was awesome to sleep like that after the week I'd had. We had pancakes and home fries for brunch, and The Boys came home at 11. Got The Youngest to organize the papers from the deepest recesses of his backpack before a friend came over, and The Oldest warmed up for a band performance in the late afternoon. Corky visited her dad, and I relaxed and did laundry. Went to the band review across the street to watch The Oldest perform the National Anthem, and watched a couple of bands before heading home for dinner. The Boys and I went back to catch the 3 high school bands I wanted to see, and the larger bands were so impressive! Saw friends and relatives and was able to visit and say hi. Came home and we all headed to bed. Corky was irritated because she wanted a family movie night, and I get it, but that is not what we do on weekends. In fact, it is rare that I am hanging about at home due to band events. And yes, there are band events over the next two weeks.
Sunday
Woke up after 11 hours of sleep ELEVEN hours. Felt Soooooo nice to sleep that long. Corky was making breakfast - egg sandwiches/egg muffins and sausage and potatoes. Very filling, and helped get me enough protein to handle this week's homework battle. Once homework was completed (hours later), I had The Boys clean their rooms and bathroom. During homework, I washed The Dogs, did laundry, changed out linens, and took a shower. Corky went home to get ready for the week. I did some shopping in the afternoon, came home and made a lasagna with shredded zucchini and whole wheat noodles. The Boys liked this one better than when I sliced the zucchini in. While dinner was in the oven I finish sanded the end table, and hopefully I'll be able to seal it tomorrow.
Tuesday, October 21, 2014
Tableau Tuesday
So some pics of this weekend's activities:
Created with flickr slideshow.
Also, yesterday Diane was on my mind. ALOT. I ran across her husband's name on a check that came through for fundraising, and I head Billy Joel and Elton John on the radio (two of her favs). It was one of those days where I would have called her if I could because my children were driving me crazy about their homework load, and I am PMS. Bad combo. And I haven't had a decent night's sleep in over a week, the weekend was too busy and tiring, and I have too many unfinished projects and issues to resolve.
I miss her. Her laugh and her ability to understand exactly what I am going through.
Created with flickr slideshow.
Also, yesterday Diane was on my mind. ALOT. I ran across her husband's name on a check that came through for fundraising, and I head Billy Joel and Elton John on the radio (two of her favs). It was one of those days where I would have called her if I could because my children were driving me crazy about their homework load, and I am PMS. Bad combo. And I haven't had a decent night's sleep in over a week, the weekend was too busy and tiring, and I have too many unfinished projects and issues to resolve.
I miss her. Her laugh and her ability to understand exactly what I am going through.
Monday, October 20, 2014
Monday Morning Weekend Wrap Up
Another really active and busy weekend.
Friday
Picked up The Youngest from school and got him a hair cut. Went back for The Oldest and Corky, headed to the mall and bought new dress clothes for The Boys. $$$ later we were set for the weekend and jazz band gigs.
Saturday
Up at 3:30 so that The Oldest could board a buss for a band review. Their band took 2 first and 2 second place trophies, and looked and sounded good. The Youngest, Corky and I followed, watched the parade and then we all wandered the boardwalk, ate, and hung out until awards. It was really awesome spending time together as a family. The weather was perfect! Stopped for dinner on the way home, and should have skipped that too, as The Boys were too full of boardwalk junk food. They fell asleep on the drive home, and once back, The Oldest headed directly to bed, the youngest had a shower and then bed, followed really shortly by Corky and me. We were out of the house for about 13 hours, all of the daylight hours, plus. Almost all of that time was spent walking and standing, and my feet, legs and back sure felt it!
Sunday
Celebration of Marriage at the Cathedral with my family. A full mass with the marriage blessing, and a reception following. My Mother enjoyed herself, and my Dad seemed at least satisfied. I really do not enjoy Roman Catholic ceremonies. Too much incense, too much burying the value of women beneath their role as helpmate for men. Maybe I am just not as forgiving and patient as I could be, but when married. straight, catholic couples are lauded for being the two to bring life into the world, I can't help but wonder how exactly the bishop and priests view the role women truly play in the propagation of their followers. Maria enjoyed parts of the homily, but having grown up attending church every week, I am over it. I am over feeling like I am not welcomed into this community, not just for who I love, but for having a failed marriage that was performed in the church. Add the condescending view of anyone who does not fit into the requirements of the church, and I am so done. People wonder why I have a dismal view of marriage and organized religion, and it is this - the unequal partnership, the snide derision for those that refuse to make it work (for whatever reason) while applauding and celebrating people who remain together, regardless of circumstance (abuse, neglect, etc.). People who believe that every sacrifice of their humanity to the power of their spouse will bring them closer to God. Willing participants in the dance, teaching their children the same "family values" for generations to come. Yes, I read between the lines (or in this case, listen), and I do take it personally. I do not appreciate that I have to re-educate my sons on the way home so that they understand that mutual respect and love of one another is what binds us all to each other. Does this mean I am not a spiritual person? No it does not. I find my soul filled with love of humanity and our earth, our circumstances, and our ability to survive, thrive and cooperate. I find my worship at the ocean, in water, and salt air. This is what fills me with love and energy for the long hard job of living.
I hope you all have a wonderful week ahead!
Friday
Picked up The Youngest from school and got him a hair cut. Went back for The Oldest and Corky, headed to the mall and bought new dress clothes for The Boys. $$$ later we were set for the weekend and jazz band gigs.
Saturday
Up at 3:30 so that The Oldest could board a buss for a band review. Their band took 2 first and 2 second place trophies, and looked and sounded good. The Youngest, Corky and I followed, watched the parade and then we all wandered the boardwalk, ate, and hung out until awards. It was really awesome spending time together as a family. The weather was perfect! Stopped for dinner on the way home, and should have skipped that too, as The Boys were too full of boardwalk junk food. They fell asleep on the drive home, and once back, The Oldest headed directly to bed, the youngest had a shower and then bed, followed really shortly by Corky and me. We were out of the house for about 13 hours, all of the daylight hours, plus. Almost all of that time was spent walking and standing, and my feet, legs and back sure felt it!
Sunday
Celebration of Marriage at the Cathedral with my family. A full mass with the marriage blessing, and a reception following. My Mother enjoyed herself, and my Dad seemed at least satisfied. I really do not enjoy Roman Catholic ceremonies. Too much incense, too much burying the value of women beneath their role as helpmate for men. Maybe I am just not as forgiving and patient as I could be, but when married. straight, catholic couples are lauded for being the two to bring life into the world, I can't help but wonder how exactly the bishop and priests view the role women truly play in the propagation of their followers. Maria enjoyed parts of the homily, but having grown up attending church every week, I am over it. I am over feeling like I am not welcomed into this community, not just for who I love, but for having a failed marriage that was performed in the church. Add the condescending view of anyone who does not fit into the requirements of the church, and I am so done. People wonder why I have a dismal view of marriage and organized religion, and it is this - the unequal partnership, the snide derision for those that refuse to make it work (for whatever reason) while applauding and celebrating people who remain together, regardless of circumstance (abuse, neglect, etc.). People who believe that every sacrifice of their humanity to the power of their spouse will bring them closer to God. Willing participants in the dance, teaching their children the same "family values" for generations to come. Yes, I read between the lines (or in this case, listen), and I do take it personally. I do not appreciate that I have to re-educate my sons on the way home so that they understand that mutual respect and love of one another is what binds us all to each other. Does this mean I am not a spiritual person? No it does not. I find my soul filled with love of humanity and our earth, our circumstances, and our ability to survive, thrive and cooperate. I find my worship at the ocean, in water, and salt air. This is what fills me with love and energy for the long hard job of living.
I hope you all have a wonderful week ahead!
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