Monday, May 12, 2014

Monday Morning - The Week that Was

It has been a week. Seven days during which The Oldest performed music, raised nearly all of his grades, turned in work on time, and was punched in the face by a kid at school.

He took it pretty well, I think more stunned than anything. The person who punched thought The Oldest had done something, while what actually happened was The Oldest helping the kid. This was corroborated by the kid who actually was doing what the puncher thought The Oldest was doing and 5 eye witnesses. The puncher ended up suspended from school, The Oldest had ice and Tylenol, and the kid who started it all wrote apology letters. I am proud that The Oldest took the hit, found his glasses (feet away), and went to the office. He didn't retaliate (though admitted he thought about it). The weird thing is that The Oldest and the puncher have known each other for years, were in the same class for many of those years, and it was an over reaction to what was thought to have happened. The people at school were also proud of The Oldest, and I feel like a tiny bit of his childhood innocence just disappeared.

During two of the mornings, The Oldest missed his first class. The first was because I woke him up early to finish homework from the previous night, and he chose to watch TV instead of work while I showered and dressed. The second was due to forgetting his backpack at his father's. The Youngest had a fairly mellow week, though his teacher finally started planning the pi day celebration (even though pi day was over two months ago).

During two of the evenings, I was able to spend time with a dear friend in from Mexico. One girls night, and the other was pizza with The Boys. It was really great to catch up, and I am so glad The Boys were able to spend time with her too.

Busy with school type meetings and teaching during the day, and an evening with friends I hadn't spent much time with recently because our kids no longer hang out together - this is the Happy Hour Playdate crowd. Corky was not happy that we spent time apart, but after last week's guilt fest, I refused to feel guilty about it, and I had a better time. One of my friends is concerned about the neediness she perceives in my relationship with Corky, and it has caused me to reflect upon that. I am a busy person with many commitments and sometimes that means I cannot spend time with Corky on her days off. Actually I work on her days off, and she works on my days off. She misses me when we aren't together, and I miss her, but I am also focused on whatever I am doing. I want a person who fits into the spaces in my life, and maybe I entered a relationship without adequate free time in my schedule. hmm. I will always choose to benefit my children by being involved in the schools. Does it cut into my social calendar? yes. It absolutely cuts into time I can spend alone or with my girlfriend. The thing is, I love Corky, and I take her into consideration when I accept or decline invitations, and make commitments. I turn down more invitations than I accept, and people are starting to notice. I need to nurture my friendships outside of my relationship with Corky. I do not wish to drop those people from my life. What I guess I don't get is, I could make Corky feel bad about spending time away from me, but I do not because it wouldn't be fair, and I don't want to be treated that way. She has commitments outside of my world, and that is fine. She needs to be connected to people outside of us, as do I. I know she reads this blog, and I know this will probably freak her out, and she may even consider telling me she won't bother me anymore. BUT, that is not the goal of this writing. The goal is to dump out of my brain all of the things floating around, and this is what is on my mind lately.

Darling Corky,
I do love you, and I want you in my life and the lives of The Boys. We will figure out a workable way to do this.

Early start to a band review for The Oldest, while the ex took The Youngest to a birthday party for one of his friends. The band review brought back memories, and was rife with parental politics. The bands sounded great, and the kids had fun. I dropped The Oldest at the ex', grocery shopped and returned home to nap. No nap. Corky came by (which was great) to cuddle, and bring gifts and snacks. On the heels of her departure, the ex texted to say he was bringing The Boys over. We hung out and watched Pitch Perfect, The Boys went to bed and I watched a couple of shows to catch up.

The Boys let me sleep in until 7:00, and woke me with cards and gifts. The ex actually took The Oldest to get me something (this is a first since we've been apart). I opened all of the gifts and cards (including from The Boys, as obtained by Corky). The Youngest made me some coffee and I got up to get ready for the day. The morning consisted of me reminding The Boys to do chores, and offering extra points to complete extra chores, Getting The Oldest to complete homework, and both showered and dressed. We headed to my sister's for the afternoon and evening, and I was able to sneak in a quick few minutes with Corky while she was on her way home. She doesn't celebrate Mother's Day since her mom passed away over 4 years ago. I understand. The Boys and I stocked up on more ammo, brought Nerf guns and xbox controllers, a green salad and cards. Dinner was great, the company better. Sister's boyfriend's family was there and they are a pretty fun crowd. The kids spent 4 hours in a Nerf war with breaks to eat. We came home, I texted goodnight to Corky and got The Boys showered and to bed.

I hope it is a calm and relaxing week for us all...

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